Normally, I do not believe in interfering in the lives of
celebrities but in light of this week’s events, I must do my civic duty. Hell, maybe even my Hollywood duty! I have
become very concerned for the well-being of one of Canada’s native sons, Mr.
Kiefer Sutherland. In my opinion, his
services are being taxed and we are demanding too much of him.
Let us all bow our heads in a moment of silence to observe
Jack Bauer. As you may remember, Mr. Sutherland played this character from
2001-2010. Nine years! That is longer than a Taylor Swift
relationship. But getting back to the matter at hand, let’s discuss Jack Bauer.
A retired serviceman and a former federal agent, Mr. Bauer was responsible for
handling major threats to national safety on a continuous basis. Every time I
turned around, something was happening to this guy or a member of his family or
his dog. Jack couldn’t catch a
break. I don’t even think he was allowed
to sleep. He was so impressive that he came back from the dead! I wonder if he complained about working too much
overtime?
Just when he thought the coast was clear and his time as our
last resort came to an end, Kiefer was pressed into service again. This time he
was Martin Bohm in the show, Touch. He was the father of a boy that could predict
events before they happened. Really?
Crap! This again? Isn’t someone else
available? Was Matt Damon bored? Didn’t anyone from the West Wing need a job? (I’m
looking at you, Jed Bartlett/Martin Sheen). Unfortunately, this series only
lasted two seasons leaving Kiefer to begin making travel plans.
Except…. wait for it, wait for it……24 returns! After public outcry and the whining of Fox
execs plus a truckload of money, Jack was back for twelve episodes in 2014.
This time he was living another day without a vacation or sleep. Hard to
believe, right? Couldn’t his son from Touch predicted this for him? It is
a hard business to be in when you are constantly expected to be the watchdog of
America. I mean, just ask Ben Affleck,
or the cast of the Avengers, or that ridiculously good looking guy who plays
Superman. I am so mesmerized by his
perfect hair and teeth; I can’t even remember his name.
Thank God, 24: Live Another Day was a limited
effort so that Kiefer could finally get the peace he deserved. Alas, this wasn’t
meant to be. ABC came knocking. Now, Mr. Sutherland is set to play yet another
government official who must lead us through a crisis. The real irony of these
situations is that Kiefer isn’t even a citizen of the US.
In his new show, he is playing Tom Kirkman. Kirkman is a
low-level cabinet member who does not attend a State of the Union address due
to the designated survivor caveat. Think
of it as the designated driver position. One member of the cabinet gets a free
pass in the event something occurs.
Of course, something tragic happens leaving casualties and now Kiefer is the commander in chief! A new series with a new set of dire predicaments is born! Once again, he has been pressed into service.
I can only imagine what decisions he will have to
make. I am certain they will be more important than my current dilemma of
whether Starbucks new Chile Mocha latte is better than their Pumpkin Spice
latte. Maybe I can ask Kiefer to help me
out. Oh yeah! He’s busy….
Do you think Kiefer Sutherland deserves a break? Do you think it’s time
another celebrity stepped up? I would love to hear your thoughts on this
subject.
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